Shopping for a House

Realtor: Here we are! As you can see, the architecture of the house we're looking at today was inspired by Victorian era mansions...

 Mr.: The color is awful.
Mrs.: Well, yes, we'd probably have to paint it.
Realtor: Now, let me remind you that this was a show house; some of the main rooms are finished and come with a few furnishings, but others are not completely finished, which allows you, as the owners, to make your own choices as far as decorating goes. That is one of the reasons why it is being offered at such a low price. It really is a steal!
Mr.: Why is there no doorknob?
Realtor: There is, it's right here on the table. We could have that installed for you in a few minutes, I'm sure.

Mrs.: Honey, I love the hardwood floors in here!
Mr.: They are nice.

Realtor: It is a excellent floor, and over here in the kitchen we have a genuine flagstone floor.
Mr.: What's up with the ancient stove? And is that a water stain on the ceiling?
Realtor: This stove is actually a top of the line, completely modern, natural gas burning stove. The design imitates stoves from a bygone era to help accentuate the vintage feel of the house. And, I assure you, there is no water stain on the ceiling, that's just a shadow.
Mrs.: I'm not sure about the wallpaper, but Honey, this kitchen is actually big enough for me to move around in!
Mr.: That's probably because there isn't anything in it yet.

 Realtor: Shall we go upstairs? On the second floor we have the master bedroom. As you can see it isn't finished, so if you were to buy this house you would be able to decorate it completely from scratch without having to get rid of any flooring or wallpaper.
Mr.: I don't see an attached bathroom. Where are the bathrooms in this house?
Realtor: Actually, this house has not been equipped for plumbing at all, so you would have to get any plumbing that you want done, for sinks or bathrooms, after purchasing the house.
Mr: What?! Who builds a house without plumbing?

 Realtor: Now won't you two come with me to the top floor? Every time I see it, I've thought that this room would make a perfect nursery, or playroom. Do you have any children?
Mrs.: No, not yet. {with a blush and a smile}

Mr.:  {clears his throat} Well, we do have more houses to look at today.
Realtor: Certainly! We can continue back downstairs. I just wanted to let you know that I took a couple through here yesterday who were very keen on the house, but needed a little time to discuss their offer. And I can tell you that we are authorized to accept a slightly lower offer than the listed price, based, as I said, on this fact that this house was a show house and, as you noticed, has not been equipped with plumbing.
Mrs.: Thank you very much!
As the Mr. and Mrs. are getting back into their car...
Mrs.: What a cute house! I loved the classic feel!
Mr: Well, that furniture would have to go. I don't know what possessed them to pick a couch that doesn't look possible to sit on.
Mrs.: It's a shame that so much work would have to be done on it, but you know, Honey, that with our budget, the only thing we can afford is a fixer-upper.
Mr.: You know what? I don't even remember seeing any outlets in the house, I'll have to call and ask the realtor about that.