09 January 2013


 hahaha....Angel carrying a baby...who is my little sister. Pretty sure that's the only time I've ever seen him do that. Usually the teeth scare the babies away, you know.

I'm going to break the #1 rule of writing today ("Write what you know") by writing about parenthood. My purpose in writing about the ideas Angel and I currently have about being parents is so that, years from now, we can look back on our recorded ideas and find out what we were right about and laugh at everything that we were wrong about.

But for now, here's the plan.

Angel and I will not name our children anything as bizarre as "Angel," nor anything as common as "Rachel".  We're going to shoot for my idea of the perfect name, as in one that's not terribly common, but also not one that you've never heard before in your life and can't figure out how to spell.

We will still go on dates when we have kids. As often as possible. Probably even vacations without kids, too. I have a Mom who's so in love with kids that she's practically offered to raise my future children if I want her to, so if it wasn't for the distance factor, I think dropping them off at Grandma's would be a very frequent activity. And I don't think I would feel bad about leaving them behind and going on adventures with my man. (This is clearly the non-mom speaking).

I will not cook different meals for each person in the house. I don't like cooking enough to do it more than I have to. I believe in a healthy, cooked from scratch, fresh fruits and veggies type of diet, but I'm okay with processed  'junk' food thrown in once in a while.

We will homeschool our children.

We will raise them bilingual from infanthood. If that means Angel speaks only Spanish with them and I speak only English, or if that means we'll speak primarily Spanish at home and English outside, I don't know yet, but I don't want our kids to grow up speaking only one language the way I did.

We will not buy them billions of toys. (I don't know if I'll be able to stop the relatives though). I prefer the idea of a few good-quality toys to toys scattered all over the house.

We will know and love our children's friends. We will supervise and set guidelines for all of their internet activities (or whatever else is the latest source of entertainment by the time we have children). We will teach them to work hard and to love the Word of God. I highly believe in supervision for young children, and in trusting them to be children--non-grown ups who don't think, or act, or make choices the way that you would expect a grown-up to, which is exactly the reason why they have parents, to lead them on the path to growing up.

All parents reading this can snicker all they want. I fully expect my ideas and ideals to change somewhat when I experience the real thing, but I also think it's a good thing for Angel and I to be thinking and planning about what type of family culture we want to create.

And, while you are snickering, don't get excited either. I can guarantee you that none of these parenting ideas will be used in the next 9 months, at least.
Moonofsilver said...

I agree with everything you said, except that we have decided never to have internet in our home. My husband speaks Japanese but I don't understand a word of it...I am animate over homeschooling. I would never send my children to be raised by the government for 8 hours a day. I know other people might feel differently, and I'm not trying to criticize others choices, these are just mine. This is how I would raise the children God gives me.

Nikki said...

Haha I've got a mom who's the same way! I don't know if I could homeschool but I like the idea.


I think it is very smart to be thinking about how you want to parent your future children, I wish more people did!

Anonymous said...

That sounds like how I was raised!! I was homeschooled some of the way though...I don't know if I would go that route.

I told my husband recently that all the toys our children are going to have are the ones that don't make noise on their own. For my sanity & the culturing of my (future) children's imagination! :)

Veronica Lee Burns said...

brave lady...homeschooling is so not for me! I like the rest of your ideas

Heidi said...

You are so right! It is good to have ideas and to start talking about how you and Angel will raise your kids (and grandparents are the BEST babysitters!) I had many ideas about how Claudio and I would raise our children. Some of them were good, some not so good but I think that's pretty much the case with most people :)

I'm also laughing right now because if your's and Angel's families are anything like mine and Claudio's, a post like this would send them into a frenzy of "when are you FINALLY going to have kids??!!"

Anonymous said...

Perfect! And by the way, since I am a Spanish teacher and only learned it in high school and college, I often wonder how to teach your kids to be bilingual from the beginning. How do they know they are speaking two different languages? What if they go out and start speaking Spanish to all the English speakers who don't know Spanish? Does Angel have any insight on this? I don't know if either of you are bilingual (like from the time you could first speak), but these are things I've always wondered.

Angi said...

I love this! Isaiah and I talk about our future parenting as well and actually have to come to many of the same conclusions that you and Angel have.

Larissa T. said...

From another nonparent's perspective...sounds great! :)

Anna said...

Mo really likes the name...wait for it... Ebeneezer.
At first I thought "he can't be serious" but he really, truly thinks it's a solid name.
Since Mo is short for Mosiah, I figured he'd go for a SOMEWHAT normal name...
oh well. I've got a long while still to persuade him to choose another name. :)

The TWIT said...

I love all these things, though some of them made me giggle a little. But it doesn't matter if they will change a little once you have kids. It is so good for you guys to talk about these things now and get on the same page about the ones that are important to you. I applaud your efforts. And I am willing to bet that you are going to be an amazing Mom when the time comes.

Unknown said...

I don't think Angel is that uncommon, but I do work with a high percentage of Hispanic students. My husband grew up bilingual until he went to school and his mom went back to work. Now he claims not to know Spanish (which is garbage because I have head him in full on Spanish conversations with native speakers that are not his relatives.)

We don't really talk about raising children, but homeschool is not for us. Probably because I am a public school teacher :)

Rachel said...

Love it!!!!
My fiance often joke about how perfect our kids are going to be, and how we're going to parent them ;-)
But we also talk seriously at times about this, too - under the FULL realization that we actually can't know how it's going to work until we get there! Scary thought!! But it's good to be on the same page, I think, which a lot of parents aren't (not by choice, of course, but these things just happen!).
Love the post! :)

Erin @ Come What May said...

I totally agree with you on toys, but I think it will be so hard to control!
A few great ideas for when there are a lot of toys that I've seen are to have them give away a toy when they get a new one of to store toys and rotate them out every few months.

Jennifer R said...

Those are great ideas... Im sure parenting is no easy task.

Michelle said...

I love this! James and I have come to may similar conclusions about our future kids.

Life according to Lenetta said...

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 Have a wonderful evening. :)

Anonymous said...

I love this list. I'm still trying to decide if I want to homeschool or not. I think if we can afford it, I wouldn't mind it for their elementary years. These days, that's the only way to guarantee a good foundation of knowledge.