28 February 2013

Why Did I get Married?

Chances are, you've heard of girls making lists of the characteristics that they would like their future husband to have. But have you heard of the concept of making a list of the reasons why you think you should marry a certain guy who you already know?

I have. When Angel and I first started courting, I made a list of all the reasons why I thought it would be a good idea to marry him. I only have vague memories of that time...but I think I also may have started a list of all the reasons why I shouldn't marry him--that list no longer survives.

I'm glad I made this list of "Whys?" because I enjoy reading through it on the days when I truly wonder why I did decide to marry Angel. Not in a regretful way, for sure, but rather in a "How in the world did I, at the age of 18, decide that I wanted to grow up and be a wife and get married and spend the rest of my life with this guy?" Sometimes our whole love story seems a little farfetched to me. Unbelieveable. And this list reminds me why it happened.

So I thought I'd share the list with you today, in all of its unedited glory.  I have to admit, to read it today makes me a bit embarrassed. Some reasons are shallow, some aren't so shallow. Many are purely practical, and at least one clearly demonstrates my lack of knowledge of the Spanish language in the pre-Angel era.

Why? [Written March-April 2010]

  • Because he is crazy about God and the Bible, and always very interested to learn more.
  • Because English is his second language.
  • He is generous. To his family as well as to strangers.
  • He loves Auntie Lilian.
  • I like his eyelashes and his teeth. Very much.
  • Nursing is a good and practical job, and it's always interesting (although sometimes disgusting) when he tells me stories about it.
  • He is absolutely not okay with divorce.
  • He is taller than me.
  • As far as I can tell, he's a pretty smart guy.
  •  He doesn't complain when I talk about my family for long periods of time.
  • I really like his first name, even if I can't pronounce his last name.
  • He does well in positions of leadership.
  • He likes to wear nice clothes, and notices nice clothes.
  • He does not say sweet things often, but when he does, it's special. (i.e. "I just wanted to say, I think you're pretty with or without your glasses.")
  • Because he has an interesting sense of humor.
  • Because he really likes The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra
  • He works well with people
  • He loves his family.
  • He is aware that Calvin is not the greatest college in the world.
  • He is sympathetic when I feel cold, even though he never feels cold when I do.
  • Of course, he's attractive.
  • Because he knows how to fix cars.
  • Because he asked me to go witnessing with the guys on Saturday nights.
  • Because he beat me at dominoes and monopoly.
  • He can play the guitar.
  • He likes Rich Mullins.
  • He paid attention and could recognize the members of my family by name before he met them.
  • He's 7 years older than me.
  • He doesn't like to be messy.
  • He can pick me up.
  • Does Hard Things.
  • He doesn't like The Message version.
  • He reminds me of Mom. 
Oh yeah, that's why.

What would convince you to get married?

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Kelsey Eaton said...

What does going witnessing mean?

Moonofsilver said...

haha "he reminds you of mom"

that was one of the first things Brian told me when we were dating "you remind me of your mom" me: thinking (you want to kiss you mom?????) lol

what a sweet list :) I didn't write down a list, but I sure had one in my head. Did Angel make a list?

BTW, I'm going to leave the no-reply thing no-reply. I've looked it up and it seems to be a glitch that will keep happening for some people, and I don't want to keep changing it. I'm just going to leave my e-mail at the bottom of comments. I hope this is not annoying--please let me know if it is!

Mrs. Bennett Has Class said...

This is so wonderful! I love it!

Natasha Atkerson said...

That was actually a fantastic idea! Like you said, you can pull it out on hard days and remember all the things you love about him!
Okay, sorry I had to laugh at the :"I really like his first name, even if I can't pronounce his last name." ;) too cute!
So I've been curious, what religon are you? (if you don't mind my asking).
A Modest Fashion Blog:

Angi said...

Haha...this is hilarious and cute and how awesome to be able to pull it out as a reminder on tough days!

I think my favorite is "Doesn't like The Message version."

Me neither. ;)

Katie said...

that is so sweet that you made that list and have it! it will be fun to look at throughout the years!

Michelle said...

Hahaha "doesn't like The Message." James & I agree :)

Cramer Coffee and Jesus said...

those are all cool reasons! seriously - some of those reasons are why I married my hubby :) one of the first questions josh ever asked me was "what do you think of divorce?" and our answers matched "it's not an option"

Anna said...

this list is fantastic! especially the part about nursing being a good, practical job with disgusting stories. :) that pretty much sums it up. I remember sense of humor and relating well with other people were two big ones... and the attractive one too. ;)

Unknown said...

Love this! Let's be real here: not every reason we marry someone is super deep, oh so spiritual! I commend you for sharing this today and sharing it unedited :)
My first time on your blog~found you on "This Little Life of Mine" and I am new follower!

Laura said...

HA! I love this list!! So many good reasons!!

Unknown said...

BEST list. Reminds me a lot of my young, naïve (no offense, dear Rachel {wink}) pre-engagement/marriage self. This is so great. :)

What would convince me to get married?
Well, a handsome, spiritual, funny, attractive, darling, helpful, responsible, gospel-oriented, romantic, kind, tender, silly, wonderful, struggling, determined, aware, openhearted, good, family-oriented, incredible, awkward, sweet, well-meaning, courageous, talented, intelligent man who held my heart. ;)

Pamela said...

This was so sweet and such a nice memory on paper to turn back on :)

Rachel D. Castagna said...

You know, I got married 12 years ago for many reasons that are listed here. But when I decided to divorce, there was only one reason - I stopped loving my husband. This single reason led me to many others, but it was the most important and the first. Later I realized that he no longer loves me either. He easily agreed to a divorce, we took the free forms on this site and sent the applications to the court. It was such a relief!