Six Sisters: Dialogue of a Photoshoot
Scene: We're watching a Korean drama, in which a major plot point is a crush that one character has had on another character for a crazy long time, like ten years.
Rebekah: "I think I could have a crush for three years, max!"
Rachel: "Three years?" [I was incredulous. Three years sounds like a really long time to me.]
Rebekah: "I said MAX."
Anna: "Three years???" [She was also incredulous.]
Rebekah: "I SAID MAX!!!"
[Mom walks into the room and overhears Rebekah's final response.]
Mom: "What's going on?"
Rachel: "Rebekah said she could have a crush on Max for three years!"
Mom: "Who's Max?"
And that is how rumors get started, folks.
Two out of the six will be leaving soon, so we decided, one fine Saturday afternoon, to dress up and do our hair and convince our only brother to come outside and take photos of us together.
The dialogue that ensued was too funny to keep to ourselves.
"Why are you taking so many pictures of Anna?"
"It's not my fault she's more photogenic than the rest of you."
"Everybody look tough."
"Sarah, why are you smiling? Is that really the toughest you can look?"
"You now how everyone always wants to use cute props in their photos? That's why everyone wants their picture taken with Anna."
"And because she's leaving."
"Lizzy, try not to look like you're angry at the clouds."
"Ahh! A car is coming! Scatter!"
"Quick, take my picture, my makeup is melting."
"Sarah, try not to look like you're being burned at the stake."
"Tilt your head down...turn your face to the side...no, that's too much...move back towards your left...your left! LEFT! Didn't your parents ever teach you your right and left?!"
"Sarah! Look at the camera!"
"Okay, in this picture, everybody laugh" *Fake laughter*
"Sarah, don't run away! The car is on the other side of the road, it won't come near us! You're safe!"
"Try to look natural."
"Open your eyes more. NO! I didn't say raise your eyebrows. Lower your eyebrows, and open your eyes more."
"I don't know what you mean! How do I 'lower my eyebrows'? That's impossible, this is just the way my eyebrows are!"
"No, trust me. Your eyebrows do not look normal. Lower them!
"This is as open as my eyes get."
"Look more relaxed."
"How can I be relaxed when you're pointing a camera at me?"
"Try to smile like you're actually happy."
"Think about funny things....think about Angel. Yeah, think about Angel, that will make you laugh! Now laugh!"
"How's my hair?"
"Isaac! Take my photo by the flowers!"
"Isaac! Take my photo by this pile of rocks!"
"Isaac! Take my photo in the middle of the street!"
"Could everyone please just look at the camera at the same time?"
"Try not to look like you're scared of the dog in the distance."
"Why does everyone keep staring at us? We're so normal!"
Basically, in case you're imagining that the typical family photoshoot involves everyone looking all gorgeous together and magically knowing how to pose nicely and looking at the camera and not really saying much of anything....you're mistaken.
In our family, the conversation never really stops. Once, when I was in high school, Lizzy turned on a tape recorder, and captured two hours of non-ending conversation between a bunch of siblings who were supposedly hard at work on school in our mother's absence.
We haven't changed much.
There's always opinions. There's always jokes. Apparently, there's a photographer who likes to use random analogies when he's commanding us to "try not to look like..." something or other.
Also, it's official now, I'm shorter than all of my younger siblings other than Sarah. Stay tuned for the next 8 years to see who will win: Sarah vs. Rachel.
Question 1: How long do you think you could sustain a crush, max?
Question 2: Have you ever experienced the strange phenomenon of eyebrows that refuse to look normal?