Angelisms, Part 10

{Scene: I walk out of the room, wearing my beautiful new birthday dress. Angel has an irrational dislike of long skirts...this dress has a long skirt.}

Angel: "I can see that you feel really pretty. Girls always like to wear things that make them feel pretty. But you have to know...just because you FEEL pretty in an outfit...doesn't mean you LOOK pretty in that outfit."

{He's always taken pride in being brave enough to say the things most husbands are wise enough not to say...he's free to do this because it doesn't hurt my feelings when he doesn't like my clothes.}

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{Scene: We just finished watching Inside Out. This will only make sense if you've seen the movie.}

Angel: {to 8 year old Sarah} "Well, It's a really good thing that Bing Bong died, right?"

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{Scene: It's 7 a.m.}

Rachel: You seem pretty happy this morning!
Angel: Yeah, I had Doritos for breakfast!
Rachel: Oh I see...
Angel: Doritos, and pop, and chocolate!
Rachel: Well no wonder you're so happy...

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{Scene: Today, apropos of nothing, we're just working on our computers in separate rooms. Angel posts a meme on my facebook wall that says:}

"Tranquila Rachel, comete un Snickers."

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{Scene: We were taking Sarah and one of her friends out to "AdventureZone", an indoor children's park, and I was telling them the rules for good behavior when Angel interrupted.}

Angel: "AND! Never....ever....ever...ever...touch...the cheetahs."
Sarah: "Umm, are there any cheetahs at the place we're going?"
Rachel: "No."
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{Scene: Sarah asked Mom what the fanciest date she'd ever been on was. Inspired, I turned to Angel and asked the same question of him.}

Rachel: "Hey, what would you say is the fanciest date we've ever been on?"
Angel: "...None."
Rachel: "???"
Angel: "We haven't had it yet!"

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{Scene: We're giving two of my sisters a ride. One of them was already pulling on the car handle when Angel unlocked the doors, so her door didn't open, and then he had to unlock her door again to let her in.}

Angel: "You know, one time Rachel and I got into a HUGE fight over that--she kept pulling on the door handle at the same time I was unlocking the door."
{I am looking over at him from the passenger seat in utter mystification. I have absolutely no memory of this "HUGE" fight ever occurring.}
Rachel: "Really? When? I don't remember that at all."
Angel: "Yes! You were so frustrated and got all mad and we got into a big argument about it."
Rachel: "I feel like I would have remembered something like this. That doesn't sound like me. Why would I get frustrated about unlocking the door?"
{The girls are giggling in the backseat over this marital confusion}
Angel: "...Oh. Wait. Never mind."
Rachel: "What?"
Angel: "Yeah...you're right. That wasn't you, that was...someone else..."
{The three of us girls burst into hysterical laughter and I felt vindicated because I couldn't understand why he was telling this crazy story about me getting mad over something silly when I couldn't remember any such event ever happening.}

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*You know, I always heard that eventually you're married long enough that memories get cloudy and you might someday tell a story thinking it's about you and your spouse when it's actually about you and an ex...I just didn't expect it to happen quite so soon...

Has that ever happened to you?